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Good Words. by Evalayen

Poetry by Argentum-Lupae-Luna

Lit by Jb1992Hjc


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Submitted on
September 2, 2012
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626 bytes
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1,094
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72 (who?)
Comments
27

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Creative Commons License
Some rights reserved. This work is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 License.
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Mummy mummy,
I met this girl

Mummy mummy,
I know you will like her

Mummy mummy,
She's a special sort of girl
She's kind
and beautiful
She's friendly
and loving

Mummy mummy,
I know she's the one

Mummy muumy,
What's wrong

Mummy mummy,
But I know you will like her

Mummy mummy,
Please don't frown

Mummy mummy,
Please don't hate me
Just a little something
Add a Comment:
 
:iconnotofthisearth:
notofthisearth Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2013
Well Done...

Billy
Reply
:iconhalonewolf:
HaloneWolf Featured By Owner Dec 16, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
This is do good Im pretty sure I'm bi but I dont know what my parents would think I know they don't hate gays but I'll tell them in a few years
Reply
:iconlittlepenguintula:
LittlePenguinTula Featured By Owner Sep 14, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
I really like this. It's simple and unique and eye catching all at the same time xD I don't like poems that are trying to be too 'artistic'. Normally the better ones are the ones that are artistic JUST because they're unique and well thought out and structured. They're far more emotive to read then ones with fancy grammar in them. Just my opinion aha. :hug: One question: am I right in saying that the message in this is what homophobia can do to relationships between parents and their children? Is the child upset because she wants her parents to accept her love, whether it be with a boy OR a girl?
Reply
:iconeye-liner-lover:
eye-liner-lover Featured By Owner Sep 15, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you I'm glad you like it and yeah that's sums up the poem almost perfectly :huggle:
Reply
:iconlittlepenguintula:
LittlePenguinTula Featured By Owner Sep 16, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
I really dooo :') And I'm glad I understood it haha (;
Reply
:iconso-nyann:
So-Nyann Featured By Owner Sep 11, 2012
COMMENTING AGAIN! So, I've read this ten times, still makes me cry. :cling:
Reply
:icongabbigale-thegoober:
Gabbigale-TheGoober Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
This was beautifully done!
Reply
:iconeye-liner-lover:
eye-liner-lover Featured By Owner Sep 15, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you :)
Reply
:icongabbigale-thegoober:
Gabbigale-TheGoober Featured By Owner Sep 15, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Ur welcome!
Reply
:iconnotensmsk:
NotenSMSK Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
It was good but the ending came a bit abrupt. I would have liked a bit more of the mummy mummy going on.
Reply
:iconeye-liner-lover:
eye-liner-lover Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you I agree about the ending wasn't to sure on how to end it :/ do you have any suggestions?
Reply
:iconnotensmsk:
NotenSMSK Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Well think of it this way... after mummy mummy I know she's the one, go into as if mummy is slowly starting to disagree or show resentment... something like:

"mummy mummy,
please do not frown

mummy mummy,
I know you will like her

mummy mummy,
please trust me

mummy mummy,
please don't hate me"
Or something like that.
Reply
:iconeye-liner-lover:
eye-liner-lover Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you that's really helpful, I've made some changes now :hug:
Reply
:iconnotensmsk:
NotenSMSK Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Now it sounds more natural :) well to me it sounds good also because I asked you to make such changes but I think it works really well now :D
Reply
:iconso-nyann:
So-Nyann Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012
I can see myself in this text ;_; Thank you for this ...
Reply
:iconeye-liner-lover:
eye-liner-lover Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I'm glad you can relate :hug:
Reply
:iconzoey113:
Zoey113 Featured By Owner Sep 6, 2012
This is so cute :3
Reply
:iconeye-liner-lover:
eye-liner-lover Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
thanks :)
Reply
:icon0l50nj4:
0L50NJ4 Featured By Owner Sep 6, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Amen.
...
Even at my age I very much feel like this little girl.
...
God! I'm getting teary!
*wet chuckle!* :-)
*wipes eyes*

Thank you so much for psoting this, it's EXCELLENT.
:-)

:worship:
:worship:
:worship:
:-)
Reply
:iconeye-liner-lover:
eye-liner-lover Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I'm glad you like it :hug: thanks for the comment :)
Reply
:icon0l50nj4:
0L50NJ4 Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
You're Welcome :-)
It was really good.
^_^
Reply
:iconangeluchiha7:
angeluchiha7 Featured By Owner Sep 6, 2012  Student Artist
awwww cute
Reply
:iconeye-liner-lover:
eye-liner-lover Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks :)
Reply
:iconangeluchiha7:
angeluchiha7 Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012  Student Artist
yw
Reply
:iconkevinlee11:
kevinlee11 Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I feel like this poem features a speaker who is trying to get her parent(s) to accept her for who she is. The language employed by the speaker contrasts itself; on the one hand she uses an expression tied to a child's nagging ("Mummy, mummy"), but on the other hand she is talking about two serious subjects: love and rejection. Love comes in as she is describing the girl whilst rejection is referred to at the end wen the speaker begs her mother to not "hate me". I think this is a wonderful poem. Keep up the good work!
Reply
:iconeye-liner-lover:
eye-liner-lover Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for a such a wonderful comment :hug:
Reply
:iconkevinlee11:
kevinlee11 Featured By Owner Sep 12, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
You're welcome :)
Reply
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